Peter, Quagmire, Cleveland, and Joe discover a Bird scooter outside The Drunken Clam and go for a joyride all the way down the East Coast. When reports of their disappearance reach Mayor Wild West, he sets out to rescue them where he manages to save them from an alligator attack off the coast of Florida. Inspired by Mayor West’s heroism, Stewie decides to get into politics too, starting with the “snack captain” race at his school, which Doug is also running for. Things get ugly as Doug viciously attacks Stewie, whose counterattacks are repeatedly drowned out by global events, and surges in the polls even after defecating during their debate. Stewie and Brian look for dirt on Doug where they discover that that he still uses a binky, but Doug counters this by suggesting that Stewie is an accident. After Brian notes how plausible the theory is, Stewie repeatedly tries and fails to make his parents fess up. After previously defecting from his campaign and feeding Doug the misinformation, Chris shows Stewie his secret porn stash, containing footage of Peter and Lois conceiving him. Stewie discovers that he was only half of an accident and ends up winning the race, not just because of the scandal making him more relatable, but also due to Doug dying in a plane crash on Election Day.