Plot

When Lois grows concerned about Chris’ health, she has him sign up for sports with Principal Shepherd’s help. Chris can’t get the hang of any until his bowels act up, unintentionally revealing his talent for speed walking as he hurries to the bathroom. Chris excels at the sport and joins Lois, Bonnie, and Donna on their walks, eventually overshadowing Lois and getting her excluded from the group. Lois challenges Chris, which he throws after she lags behind. Chris feels that Lois deserves her friends more than he does and admits that he’s over the idea of adult female friends since they don’t share nudes. Meanwhile, Brian barks loudly to warn the neighbors about a pack of coyotes on Spooner Street, unintentionally startling Quagmire into destroying his rice sculpture. Quagmire files a police report, prompting Joe to give Brian a shock collar until he can suppress his barking habit. Brian struggles adjusting to this new change due to his instincts, not helped by Quagmire repeatedly taunting him. Out of revenge, he swipes another collar from Joe’s car and slips it on Quagmire, forcing him to speak quietly too. Brian later overhears Quagmire being attacked by the same coyotes he warned him about. Baiting them to attack, he uses the shocks from his collar to ward them off and explains that even though he may hate Quagmire, as a dog protecting his neighbors is his duty.